Would you mind?…. This is my raft… Oh don’t try and play that everlasting romance trick on me, and it’s not Rose, it’s Miss DeWitt Bukater… The water might be cold, that’s what you get when there are icebergs around. It’s not exactly toasty on this lump of wood, why don’t you go and find your own?

A special evening together, a special evening? I’m not sure how much I remember. Oh, when we went and jigged with those smelly people in that smoke-filled cabin. Yes, I suppose that was fun.. for about ten minutes, but there was nothing romantic about it or after it. All I can recall is going back to a cabin that didn’t reek of tobacco and stale cabbage, throwing off those stinking clothes and falling asleep on the sofa. Must have been a bit squiffy, had I been drinking?

You drew a picture of me, did you? As long as that’s all you did. What’s your name?..  Jack?.. Well, I do have a recollection of this tale of woe. Poor lad scraping a living in Paris by sketching, but hey-ho you won a ticket to New York. So life’s not that bad is it? Bit of a hitch now, mind you, but think of your future in America.

Yes, I did say I love you. But this is a cruise, one is almost obliged to do something silly, fall in love and then never see each other again… Should I be grateful, Jack, is that your name?…. Well, Jack, I was never going to throw myself off the ship. Why would I do that? I have everything a girl could possibly want, clothes, jewels, travel, plenty of friends, friends who love shopping. It’s true I’ve had to compromise over my fiancée, but, if I’m clever, five minutes a month will shut him up. Anyway, he’s rich enough to get himself a mistress that I can pretend I don’t know about. The fact is, I am alright Jack.

Yes, I’m sorry too, but this is a first-class raft Jack and what are you? Mmmmm, third-class. Oh, you’re going, byeeee.